Monday, June 30, 2014

When things get slow in the summertime.

Sometimes my 7 year old g-girl Drew snatches up my camera and goes looking for some art.  And surprisingly her snaps are more creative than not.  These are just a few.

We've had a fun filled month of summer vacation.  She had swimming lessons for 2 weeks and did awesome. We had VBS at church where she reconnected with Kolia a kindred spirit in energy.  And this week is the 4th of July, so we'll stay up late and do the fireworks thing.

Here is her sister caught by her lens:
That's her mean-girl look.

Now to try and keep the fun going for the last month and a half of this summer.  Maybe we'll do some more creative snap shots.

Friday, June 20, 2014

Five Minute Fridays: Release

Well, here it is another Friday.  I've only linked up once before, I think, cuz I can't seem to remember how and EVERY Friday is too much for this old gal.  But today it is release.

Release.  I am surprised that this is the theme this week.  But really I shouldn't be.  I simply LOVE to see God work things together in my heart before I realize He is there working.

You see, just today, as I was praying over many things, and many people I try to remind Him to take notice of, I was moved to release.

Release the worry about whether the VBS drama I am in charge of will work out okay or not.

Release the fear that the grumpies I experienced yesterday with my fussy ggirl will raise its ugly head next week when I'm trying to be an example to my ggirls and my actors.

Release the fear that The Pain will raise its ugly head and try to thwart God through me!

For all these things have come in the past.  All these things have come and God has always shown up.  And all has been as He desires it to be.

I know I love when He pushes me to my limits, physically, emotional and spiritually, then when I can't hold on any longer, He pries my fingers loose.  And when I free-fall, He is there beneath me (above me, around me, and always IN ME!) to carry the weight.

Release.  It does my soul good.

So join me with your 5 minutes of from the hip writing!

Five Minute Friday

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

All of Me?

"Here I am, Lord.  Send me!"

I have shouted those words over and over in my heart.  Missionaries come to share what they are doing out there in the world of the lost, and I beg God to send me.

Teens with such awesome faith travel to foreign lands and come home to share it with me.  And I beg God, "Please!  Send me!"

Then in His own time, in that still small voice, He shakes His head and says, "Not this time."

Have you ever wanted to serve God so fully that you shout to Him to use you, but He quietly refuses.  Or so it seems.

I have always believed Isaiah 40:31.

"Those who wait upon the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary."

I have believed these precious words.  I have waited.  And waited.  And waited.

But I have not waited unproductively.  I once heard a lesson on this waiting, that it is an anxious-for-the- arrival kind of waiting.  A running to the window every few seconds to see if it (they) have arrived.  Like waiting for company.

And that is the definition of the word waiting here in Isaiah 40:31.  The Hebrew word is qavah.  And the definition of it is "to wait, look for, hope, expect" (Stong's).

I know this kind of waiting.  Whenever guests are expected at our home, I clean and cook and clean some more.  I pace, I sit, I check the driveway.  Impatience personified.

I would be in trouble if the verse said to wait patiently for the Lord.  Patience.  Not so much.

One year ago I felt a tugging at my heart about my "service" to the Lord.  He was saying it was time to stop striving, to stop doing for Him, and just wait.  So I, more like we, hubby and I, resigned from youth work and began a period of waiting.

Again, remember, I am not good at patience.  But He kept reminding me that it is not my service He wanted, but me.

I figured okay I'll pray and wait and wonder.  In the mean time, I better have my foot looked at since I could no longer walk a block without pain.  I figured it was some type of strain and that I needed different walking shoes.

X-rays revealed nothing.  Confining my foot in one of those bulky, ortho, walking boots was my next step.

Okay.  I'm waiting.  Guess I can limp around in that.  

Ortho boots are not easy to get on and off, and since it was my right foot, that is exactly what I had to do if I wanted to drive anywhere alone.

Guess what?  I decided not to run errands during the week.  It was so much easier to stay put.

So I waited.  And waited.  6 weeks turned into 8 by the time I got an MRI (because the boot didn't help!).  Patience wearing very thin as the holidays came.  Passed.

Then the results of all the waiting.  A torn tendon in my foot.  Treatment:  surgery.

Now, I'm not new to surgery.  I've had a number of them, mostly simple, 2 rather intense.  And I know my body, the one with fibromyalgia.  The one that does not handle pain well.

Surgery.  This is not the type of service I had had in mind when I said, "Here I am, Lord.  Send me!"  I had meant, here I am, healthy and strong and raring to go and move mountains for You!  

And He is saying, "All of you?  You give me all of you?"  yes.  "Then this is what I'm calling for now."

So I wait.  I wait for the date of the surgery.  I wait to deal with crutches and some scooter thingy and pain and not seeing my ggirls as often.

Did I really expect His work for me to be fun and games?  Well, I had come from youth ministry with wild games of chase, over-night laser questing, and motivating summer camps.  Not to mention FOOD!

And now?  

I truly believe that there is no better place to be than in the center of God's will for you.  Someone said that once and I've thought of it often.

So I truly believe that strength will come as I wait.  I'll do the next thing, as Elisabeth Elliot wrote.

And I'll remind God--I'm not much of a patient.